Dreams of Falling

I hear dreams of flying are almost universal among humans, like dreams of teeth falling out or going to school naked. But I've never had a flying dream. Instead, for as long as I can remember, I have had this dream of falling.

It's a very specific dream: I am driving up a steep mountainside on a switchback road. I am going very fast and I have a passenger or two in the car with me (this part varies, depending on whom I'm living with at the time of the dream). I hit one of the corners and it's pretty close, so I slow down. But no matter how hard I hit the brakes, it's not enough for the next turn, and the car just sort of *slips* off the edge. And down we go, in a calm arc, just like a cartoon. And I'm not scared, but I feel this terrible regret, that this is the end and that I was responsible.

Not surprisingly, I have a terrible fear of switchback roads. I suppose I could be sensible and interpret this dream in a Jungian fashion and point out my fears of being responsible for other people, or perhaps the lack of control I feel over my own life. Maybe we can bring my mother into it somewhere, hmmm? But no, I've always been very literal and mystical about the dream: this is how I'm going to die.

Ten years ago I was driving back roads to visit the Grand Canyon when the road all too abruptly went from dull and flat to one little sign noting a speed decrease to a sudden, terrifying drop. I slammed on the brakes and there it was: the mother of all switchbacks. My nemesis. http://www.midwestroads.com/otherstates/mokidugway/. It was a good thing that it was such a rapid drop in elevation, because I don't think I started breathing again until I hit the bottom.

I didn't die, of course.  You'd think that would have helped, but my dreams are actually worse now (more video footage to draw from) and driving down even tiny switchbacks sends me into flashbacks.  Someday.  Someday that cliff is gonna get me.  And you'll know what I'll be thinking when I go down.

Oh no, not again.